I have a cold.

I find this amazingly ironic as it has been as hot as 82 degrees this week.

How can I have a cold when it is so hot?

And I am not cold. I am hot. So shouldn't I have a hot?

Having "a cold" is very odd language. I never have a "luke warm." I suppose I could have a hot (body), but only if I went to the gym more.

I looked up the etymology of cold, as in the common cold. The term originates in 1537. (I wonder what they called it before then. "I have an illness to be named in the future.")

It was referred to as "a cold" because it is similar to symptoms of being exposed to the cold.

I don't think that the reference is entirely accurate. When I am exposed to the cold, I usually curse. When I have a cold, I whine.

In either use, temperature or illness, I am generally against cold, with an exception for ice cream.

I have yet to see evidence I have "a cold." Who is to say I do not have "the cold?" I mean, if one fruitcake gets passed around the world every Christmas, what is to say that there is not only one cold passed from person to person. Assuming this, I have been sneezing on people in an effort to give away the cold. (Want to come over?)